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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Stillness Speaks. But Who is Listening?

I've been reading Eckart Tolle's Stillness Speaks, which is a pithy (paragraphically speaking) collection of distilled nuggets from his earlier work, The Power of Now, and his ongoing seminars.

It's the kind of stuff that will give you a stroke if you think about it too hard. Which might explain my occasional aphasia. I've been going to sleep these last few nights with such embolism inducing thoughts as, "The truth is: you are not somebody who is aware of the tree, the thought, feeling, or experience. You are the awareness or consciousness in and by which those things appear."

And, "'I am bored.' Who knows this? 'I am angry, sad, afraid.' Who knows this? You are the knowing, not the condition that is known."

And my all time favorite vessel popper: "Then accept what is. Yes. Bring acceptance into your nonacceptance. Bring surrender into your nonsurrender. Then see what happens."
See what happens?

What happens is that the whole left side of my body seems to have gone numb and I have a splitting headache out of nowhere. Which got me thinking, if I'm not me, or my thoughts, or even the observed content that appears on my field of consciousness, but I'm the observer--what does it feel like to not exist? I wondered about this as a child, and tried to imagine it. That's where I got a head start on my embolism, I think.

Does it hurt to not exist?
It hurts to exist, certainly, but what is the sensation of not being?
Is it like sleeping, or is it like never sleeping?
Is it a state of constant desire, hunger?
Or is it a massive black hole of apathy?

Ow, my head hurts.

Cindy

4 Comments:

Blogger Queen of the Inane said...

I often ponder non-existence. What happens when you cease to exist, or do you ever just not exist? Do we exist at all...or are we just a dream? Taking my crazy pills today.

1:57 PM  
Blogger Cindy St. Onge said...

I wonder the same thing. "Am I really here, or just dreaming that I'm here." Or, "What if I'm dead, and don't know it?"

Question: Do your pills make you crazy or relieve the crazy?

"I'll have what she's having."


Cindy

2:23 PM  
Blogger Rock Kauser said...

You’ve got to be kidding me; I think they stole my book! Here is an excerpt from “The Force of this very Moment”

Bring laughter to into your crying. This will cause you to snort milk through your nose.

Find happiness where you now find sadness. If you can do this you will see just how happy you can be after observing a multiple fatality accident where a drunken dump truck driver broadsides a school bus.

Look for meaning where there is no meaning. If you can find meaning in the thoughts of George W. Bush then you have reached true enlightenment.

Bring life where there is death and you will become the next messiah. See what happens.

(For a hint just look to JC to see what happens to messiahs)

12:45 PM  
Blogger Cindy St. Onge said...

Rock, you're tapped into something.
I didn't know you've published a spiritual book. Wow. I'm impressed.

It's quite aligned with Tolle's philosophy, and some others' too, like Gaganji etc.

You're right on the money about GW Bush. "Look for meaning where there is no meaning." I love it!

1:18 PM  

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